Stripped Back: Who I Want To Be

Many questions are pondered upon by nearly every human being, but perhaps none so much as the question, "What is my purpose?"  The discovery of who you are and finding the person you want and are meant to be is perplexing, yet wonderful - but how do you do it?  Very rarely will any great discovery be made without action and persistence.  You can sit all day long on a white, sandy beach, drinking a piña colada with a little umbrella, thinking about the meaning of your life and who you're supposed to be, but the only thing you'll walk away with, besides a sunburn, is just that - thoughts.  We all know the definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again expecting the same results. For a lot of you this means you just need to do something, for others this means you need to do something different.  Since I'm a science geek, I like to postulate this in scientific form.  Say the thoughts on your life-purpose are a hypothesis.  A hypothesis can either be true or false, so how do you find out which it is?  You test it.  You take action to approve or disprove the statement.  From there you can develop your theory, in this case, your theory on life, who you are, and who you want to be.  This doesn't always mean you're going to end up with a clear-cut answer, but it can certainly point you in the right direction toward your next hypothesis in refining and defining your life.  I could also explain this in the form of an endergonic chemical reaction . . . but I'll spare you - you're welcome.

If I'm honest with myself and with you, the amount of self-discovery I've made in my life is just about equal to the amount of mistakes I've made. It's a trial and error process.  I've happened to make a lot errors, but that's where persistence kicks in.  William E. Hickson is credited for saying: If at first you don't succeed, try, try, try again.  It's a simple statement but it's truth.  Try, try, try again.  If I'm being more honest, the mistakes I've made have shown me more about who I am than the times I get things right.  It takes perspective and a positive attitude to see imperfection in a favorable way.  Having the right perspective will either make or break you and the degree of your attitude will either diminish or enhance your experiences.  Take all circumstances, good and bad, and turn them into positive assets that shape and make you.  Where do you find the ability within yourself to be knocked back so many times, yet still keep pressing forward?  This could be answered in a number of ways, but you probably already know the answer.  What is it that recharges you in your life?  It could be through a relationship that loves and encourages you.  It could be through an activity you find refreshing to your spirit.  It could even be as simple as resting in silence or listening to music that brings you back to life.  I personally find all these things, my strength and energy, from my relationship with God.  He loves me, encourages me, when I pray He listens and comforts me, and when I allow myself to sit in his presence, it's like taking a big, cool breath of fresh, life-giving air.  No matter what it is for you, and it could be several things, use them constantly to renew your heart and spirit.

Finally, it's never too late to be what you might have been (quote from George Eliot).  No matter where you are in your life walk, it's never too late to be the person God has purposed for you to be.  Not to say that I'm old, but I'm half-way through my 24th year of life and compared to most of the people my age, I've fallen behind.  I'm at the low end of the ever so popular bell-curve.  Most have accomplished so many things, whether it's a degree, career, or starting a family, etc.  I have none of that to my name.  I just started going back to school to get my first bachelor degree, I don't have a career, and nor do I have a boyfriend let alone a family of my own.  I live in a one-bedroom apartment in a "bad part of town" with my cat I'm too lazy to give a real name to.  That's pretty much the extent of my accomplishment and it's easy to only focus on that and get discouraged, especially when you put it next to someone else's life and start comparing.  Everyone seems to have a timeline for the events in their life to occur, but who says our timeline has to match the ones of the people around us?  We all feel we have to fit this mould that society has laid out before us.  Like squeezing into a snug pair of jeans, we may fit, but as soon as you get home the button and zipper come undone, or if you're feeling extra bloated they come off altogether.  So stop trying to fit these badly misshapen moulds.  Whether you're young and just beginning to walk this life of self-discovery or whether you are much more aged in the process, it's never too late.  You only have one life to live and every moment counts no matter how many you have left.  Make your life count.  Don't sit back in angst as you let this precious time pass you by.  Be the best person that you can be and start now. Do something. Take action.

Who I Want To Be:
Who I want to be stretches far beyond my job description - shocking since I live in America.  When asked, "Who are you?", most are quick to respond with name and occupation. We're always so focused on title, but who we are as people has little to do with the amount of prestige we hold.

Stripped of all titles, this is the person I want people to eventually see me as and areas I want to always continue to grow in. (This list is not intended to be exhaustive)

• I want to be worth far more than diamonds:  This simply means that I want my worth to come from more than earthly materials.  I don't want the amount in my bank account to determine the caliber of my value and desirability.
• I want to be a bringer of good to the world:  A quality of the great is that they leave places and things better than when they came.  I want a place or a person to be better because of my presence, never worse.
• I want to be a hard worker with eager hands:  I never want to be seen as lazy or grudgingly compliant.  I want to be known for my willingness to do the "dirty" work and the attitude at which I do it with.
• I want to be an investor in the lives of others:  Creating margin in my budget and in my life to be generous to, build up, and encourage others in their lives and endeavors is something I never want to cease to exist in my life and I want to always find room to grow in it.
• I want to be a person of open arms, heart, and home:  My life should always contain a safe place for others to come to for rest, encouragement, love, and advice.
• I want to be empowered with strength and dignity:  I want the things I do and accomplish to be laced with the determination, vigor, fortitude and morality that I possess.
• I want to be filled with laughter and joy:  Everywhere I go, everything I do, in every circumstance I find myself in, I want to always be filled with gratification.  I want to find reasons to laugh and enjoy every moment - no matter how impossible it may seem.
• I want to be a speaker of wisdom and faithful with instruction:  The words I speak shall always be rooted in love and never frivolously spoken.  I want to remain flexible enough to take guidance, but firm enough to stand my ground.

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."
-Proverbs 31:30

My next series, "Lost", is going to focus on how I got to the place I am in my life.  I'll discuss how I came to the point of losing my faith in God, losing my relationships, and how I lost myself.  In that, I'll also delve into what brought me back and turned me around, putting me on the path I am on now.


If you have any questions or comments that you would like a response to, please comment at any time or email me at walkauthentic@gmail.com and I'll try to answer them for you.  This is a journey I want us to take together.